Thursday, November 12, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
Is this a morally acceptable thing to do? In both “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Askaban” and “Back to the future” the characters who are doing the time travelling, (Hermione Granger and Marty Mcfly) respectively are told by the minstry of magic and Doc Brown to not alter the events of time as it may have disastrous consequences for their futures, as we see when Marty begins to disappear when he stops his parents first meeting and chance to fall in love. So what about changing one of the most historically significant events ever?
And if you did it that early on in the period, people wouldn’t have known how bad he was. So in history he would have been considered a great leader for Germany, therefore you would probably be considered in the same way as Lee Harvey Oswald and the guy who killed John Lennon are.
It would still be pretty cool I guess.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Friday, October 9, 2009
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Monday, October 5, 2009
Sorry about all the words. Really needed to get this traumatic experience off my chest by way of a blog post
Note: Copy pasting this from word kinda fucked shit up format wise for some reason. Just bear with it. Deep down you don't give a shit about formatting.
I’ve recently learnt the hard way that I’m never going to make a fortune selling shit on the internet. My dad lent me a car on the condition that I sell it on trademe at some point in an attempt to subtly divert my future towards the soul crushing, but my life sustaining car business. I’ve given the car a good run, but now it’s becoming a bit of a money sink as it guzzles down gas like tsunamis guzzle down people. It’s also getting a bit grubby not to mention I get to keep any profit made on the car, which will useful in sustaining certain habits. The fucking bummer about the whole situation is having to deal with people on trademe who seem less than eager to just hand over their fucking cash already. They ask questions about shit that I can’t find in the manual then they call me and ask more questions that I have to artfully talk around in my stammering, teenage retard phone voice. The internet is great because it is so impersonal and this whole experience is ruining it for me. I’m meeting internet people. They are coming to my house. I’m going for little drives while they make small talk with me. One guy was all, “I’m the guy who asked about cruise control” as if he was some kind of D-grade celebrity. “It’s good for long drives, y’know.”
“Oh, yeah” I replied. “You do a lot of long distance driving?”
“No, not really” he said casually. As if what he had just said wasn’t the most retarded bullshit ever. And this was before we had even got in the car. I thought he’d find it funny or at least show some kind of reaction to the death metal that began blasting when he started the car, but no. Nothing. He wasn’t one for fun and games which meant I was in trouble as he probably wanted to know stuff about the car. “Oh! We’ve got tip-tronic* gear change, I see.” He said as if it were something worth being excited about.
“Uh yeah, it does.” I replied, well and truly sick of this bullshit, desperately hoping he would decide to head back soon as the car was running on nothing but my my prayers and the dreams of young children, as I wasn't putting gas in a car that I was gonna be giving to some fool. The petrol light had been on all week. He began fucking round with the tip-tronics and accidentally down shifted which made a god awful noise, that, I, knowing nothing about cars assumed did irreparable damage to the transmission. I couldn’t understand why a guy who wants cruise control would care about being able to change the gears in an automatic car. He wants to fuck around with the lever, but he doesn’t wanna push the accelerator. I’m thinking that is some deeply repressed masturbatory shit going on right there. Even though my mind had strayed to this guys jacking off habits, I thought the whole thing had gone well. But it hadn’t. When he got out of the car he found the fault that I had failed to inform him off the. The central locking is fucked. This was the deal breaker for this uptight piece of shit even thought the car is way cheaper than anything else on the site. Too bad it wasn’t raining and he didn’t initiate the window wipers that screech at a frequency that sets off a chemical imbalance in your brain giving you clinical depression.
Moral of the story is: Making money on the internet isn’t as fun as the people who made World of Warcraft, or that guy who traded a paperclip for a house make it out to be. Stay in school and get a real job. “It’s not worth it, eh.”(RIP smoking guy from the telly).
PS. Reading over this I realize this makes me seem like a whiney motherfucker. Don’t worry guys; this isn’t a flaw in my writing style. That’s just what I’m like.
* Tip-tronics let you change the gears in a car with automatic transmission. Usually only used to lock the car in gear when you’re going down hill, but this guy thought he was a bad ass changing gears on his own on the mean streets of Fendalton.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Friday, October 2, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
I don't know if any people from our school really read BLTB, but my attention was recently drawn to this facebook conversation. The whole argument arose because Sam's head had been photoshopped on the naked body of some guy and Emma disapproved or something, you can see it here if you want. Sam proceeds to call Emma fat, which she kind of is, and all hell broke loose from there.
Hoping to see a proper fight or something, I'd very much like it to escalate to fisticuffs.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
There's something about overweight gamers getting regrettable tattoos that tickles me pink. I'm not sure if it's just the plain absurdity or the very few amount of people that will understand it or even find it funny that makes it so great. That said, I get these two, and I'm very glad I can cross off another few pictures on my 'tattoo ideas' list. To me it's pretty much like an electrician getting the Dick Smith Electronic logo on their arm or something, or a selection of Halo tattoos.
News flash! Only the first Halo was good.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Had to go to the doctor the other day. I’ve been feeling pretty down in the dumps. Fatigue, sore throat, headache. My dad’s GF was like, “bro, you have glandular fever.” I did the sensible thing and googled: “glandular fever” and convinced myself I had it then booked an appointment at the doctor. Turns out a million years at doctor school doesn’t teach you anything about time management. I got so bored waiting that I asked for a SARS mask that was meant for people with coughs(I thought it might be fashionable). When I was finally called into the doctor’s office she saw my mask and said, “let me guess. You have a cough, right.” Sadly, I didn’t have a cough and her joke was ruined. For the rest of the visit she seemed rather apathetic to my situation. She didn’t believe that I had glandular fever, but I reckon she’s just trying to fuck up my shit ‘coz I ruined her joke. Now I’m gonna get jaundice, and anaemia from the “glanj” (a little bit of hip slang for glandular fever) and I’m gonna die. This is like that time on World of Warcraft where something went wrong on some quest and I was poisoned by a poison that prevented me from going into stealth mode (the most important mode for a rogue FYI) for a whole week. I was freaking out. I had no idea how to cure it. I tried concocting an anti-venom which consisted of gathering venom glands from spiders that had an 8% drop rate in the middle of butt fuck nowhere. Once I finally got one I found out that it didn’t work. Turns out any druids could heal it instantly in the end. This I only found out after about an hour and a half of hardxcore virtual foraging. Maybe I need an IRL druid to help with my possible glandular fever. Too bad all real life druids aren’t really “people people” and are all like, “oh, sorry, I can only shapeshift when no one else is around.” If by “shapeshift” they mean jack off then sure, I believe them.
Remember that post on that guy, Bradley, who told me about the parties he went to where chicks put cellphones up their vadges and took photos? Well he added me back on facebook. Now you guys can put a face to the name.(he's the one on the left with the shaved head)
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Just wondering where everybody was at the time of the Australian fires? I'm pretty 'outdoorsy' so I took the opportunity for some rare skateboarding photographs.
Although a family of six were in desperate need of help, I had to prioritize, good skating photos are more important to me than anything else in the world - any publicity is good publicity.